First Impression Bias

Have you ever liked someone almost instantly because of the way they spoke, carried themselves, or presented themselves?

It happens to all of us.

Our minds are constantly trying to make sense of people, and sometimes one noticeable quality becomes the basis for everything else we think about them.

A confident person may appear more capable. A well-dressed person may seem more successful. A charismatic leader may immediately appear more competent.

But do we really know that?

Not necessarily. We may simply be allowing one positive quality to influence our judgement of qualities we haven’t actually observed.

This can quietly affect important decisions—whom we hire, whom we trust, whom we admire, and even whom we choose to build relationships with.

The interesting thing is that we usually don’t realise it is happening. We genuinely feel that we are judging the person objectively.

The same thing can happen in the opposite direction. One unpleasant experience or negative characteristic can make us see the entire person negatively.

But people are rarely that simple.

Someone can be confident but not competent. Someone can be charming but not trustworthy. And someone who is quiet or reserved may have exceptional abilities that simply aren’t visible at first.

This is why a first impression should be a starting point, not a final conclusion.

Perhaps, before judging someone, we should pause and ask ourselves: “What do I actually know about this person, and what am I simply assuming?”

That small pause can make our judgements fairer, our decisions wiser, and our relationships more genuine.

Because sometimes, the person we think we see is only the person our mind has created from one small part of the picture.

Look beyond the first impression. See the whole person.

In Love & Gratitude, Rakesh Babu

Psychologist | www.shreshtaminds.com

Emotional imbalance does not always come from emotional turbulence.

Sometimes, it comes from being emotionally overwhelmed—even by positive emotions.

In both situations, we can temporarily lose touch with ourselves.

We may forget our patterns, our strengths, our talents, and even our past experiences. For a few moments, the situation feels bigger than our ability to handle it.

The first thing to do is simple: stay calm for a few minutes.
Don’t react immediately when your emotions are taking over.

• Give yourself some space to breathe, pause, and settle down.
• Once you are calmer, try to regain some emotional and cognitive balance.
• A balanced mind can see possibilities that an overwhelmed mind cannot.

Then ask yourself, “What are the possible ways I can sort this out?”

Because sometimes, the problem itself carries a clue to its solution.

The problem may be pointing towards a pattern that needs to change, a choice that needs to be made, or a perspective that needs to shift.

In that sense, the problem is not always just an obstacle; sometimes, it is also the key.

When we think deeply and calmly, our thinking can reorganize and become more flexible.

This is where our brain’s natural capacity to adapt and learn can support us.

And remember, you don’t have to solve everything by yourself.

If you cannot find a way forward with your own abilities, seek support from an expert.

Sometimes, another person simply sees what we could not see because we were too close to the situation.

Until that point, there is much within our hands: calm down, regain balance, and think.

And if nothing works, that’s okay—sometimes a fresh pair of eyes is all we need to find our way again.

In Love & Gratitude, Rakesh Babu | www.shreshtaminds.com

We often think we are living our lives through conscious choices, but much of everyday life is quietly shaped beneath awareness.

The Conscious Mind is where we think, decide, communicate and respond to what is happening right now.

The Pre-conscious Mind holds information and memories that can quickly come into awareness when we need them.

The subconscious mind quietly influences our habits, emotional reactions, preferences and automatic behaviours.

Deeper within, the unconscious mind may hold patterns and experiences that influence us without our immediate recognition.

And contemplative traditions point towards another possibility—the superconscious, where awareness moves beyond habitual thinking into deeper clarity and insight.

Imagine someone criticising you unexpectedly.

Your conscious mind hears the words, but another layer may immediately create an emotional reaction.

An old subconscious pattern may whisper, “I am being rejected again.”

The unconscious may carry the deeper story behind that feeling.

Yet there is something extraordinary about human awareness: we can observe the reaction instead of becoming the reaction.

That small space between stimulus and response is where conscious living begins.

Through reflection, mindfulness and inner observation, we gradually become aware of the architecture operating within us.

We begin to recognise that every reaction has a history, every habit has a pattern, and every pattern can potentially be understood.

Awareness does not mean fighting the deeper layers of the mind.

It means bringing what was automatic into the light of understanding.

When awareness grows, yesterday’s conditioning does not have to become tomorrow’s behaviour.

Perhaps personal growth is, therefore, not about changing who we are overnight but understanding what is operating within us, layer by layer.

The deeper we understand our mind, the more consciously we can design the life we live.

In Gratitude, Rakesh Babu | Psychologist | www.shreshtaminds.com